New Years Resolutions Wins & Defeats

Every year millions of people set new goals, hopes, and dreams for the New Year, only to fall short or give up within the first few weeks.

Studies show the average person who sets a New Years resolution gives up on it around January 8^th.

And yet, year after year, we do it again. We sign up for a new gym membership. We swear off alcohol. No more candy. (Those last two were mine.) And like clockwork, we fall off days or weeks later.

Or… at least that’s how we tell the story.

On January 1st, at 7:00 a.m., my wife and I introduced the idea of a New Year’s resolution to our five-year-old, Jude.

Yes, 7 a.m. on New Year’s Day. That’s life with kids and a regular bedtime routine. A love-hate relationship if there ever was one!

We explained that a New Year’s resolution was something new you wanted to work on and accomplish during the year. Something that mattered to you.

Without hesitation, Jude said, “I want to learn how to ride my bike.”

Side note: We had just booked a week-long trip to Copenhagen for the summer and told him that everyone rides bikes there. We said if he practiced really hard, he could ride too.

Apparently, that part stuck.

So naturally, coach-dad kicked in.

We packed up the bike and headed to a spot I knew well flat pavement, no cars, and a playground nearby for motivation afterward. I wrapped a towel around his chest and under his arms and told him we’d use it to help him feel his balance.

I also told him the truth.

That he might get frustrated.

That he might fall.

That trying something new is hard.

But that he was a Love, and a Love always gets back up.

After about ten minutes, I could tell something was clicking. I told him we’d do one more lap with the towel and then I’d be there without it.

Sure enough, after that last round, the towel came off.

And suddenly, there he was.

Pedaling.

Balancing.

Moving forward all on his own.

No training wheels. No towel. No hands.

When he hopped off the bike, he was smiling from ear to ear. I gave him a high five and he said, “I did it. I can do it without any help!”

It was one of those moments you never forget as a parent. It took me right back to riding around my neighborhood as a kid, completely unaware of how big moments like that really are.

We immediately called my wife so he could tell her the news himself. He was glowing with pride.

Later that night, we were talking about the day and she said, “Well, I guess he already completed his New Year’s resolution.”

“By 8:45 a.m.,” I laughed.

And that’s when it hit me.

That day wasn’t really about Jude learning to ride a bike.

It was about how progress actually works.

The goals we reach usually share some of the same ingredients: they matter to us, they have some sense of timing, and we’re not trying to do them alone.

Jude didn’t ride because he was tougher or more athletic. He rode because someone believed in him, stayed close, and helped him find his balance long enough for confidence to take over.

Most resolutions don’t fail because we’re incapable. They fail because we isolate ourselves and expect change to happen in a vacuum overnight.

So, this year, don’t just set a goal.

Build support around it.

Invite someone into it.

Let yourself wobble.

Because eventually, the towel comes off and you realize you’ve been capable all along.

Cheers to a New Year, new goals, and accomplishments!

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Jude's First Bike Ride